While we all came back home from our trip to Taiwan after a short spring break – the spouse headed out to Budapest for work and this time on his own of course. I had to head back with the kids and prepare them for the new term for school. While some of you may envy that the spouse travels for work – and goes just about everywhere – he said he doesn’t envy his lifestyle at all. Staying in hotels and eating hotel’s food isn’t an enjoyment for him anymore – in fact, he usually just stays indoor and order room service if he didn’t have to – for a business lunch or dinner. This trip he is away for 14 days but it may be more – who knows – it usually last longer and being a spouse of a traveling working man – I am used to it and I just go about my own things with my kids in tour. My life does not spin around the spouse’s schedule as his is pretty busy but whenever he is online – we all skype with him a lot.
My son who loves hotdogs when he is home in the West – wouldn’t eat any of the chinese sausages on the streets of Taipei. How funny is that ? cultural difference or just being a Canadian snob? his dad say that he is just being a snob but he claims that they didn’t look appetizing at all. My daughters on the other hand would try just about anything and everything and some of you may be asking me if it was alright to eat street food in Taiwan – and I have to tell you that it’s no difference from street food found on exhibition or any kind of Farmer’s market here in Canada. So if you are thinking of visiting Asia anytime soon – make sure you are no food snob.
My son asked me if he could drink this ? since it was only 3.3% alcohol, he said to me, but it’s only a cocktail ! but you see in Taiwan the age limit for drinking is different as compared to the West. The spouse looked at him and laughed and allowed him to have a bottle which I frown. While in Canada, you can only buy liquor in an authorized store, in Asia, you can buy them in a grocery store, making it a lot easier for kids to get to them. No wonder we see a lot more drunk driving in Asia than in Canada where I lived.
So it’s the March break the the spouse is in Taiwan, so what do one do with a bunch of kids who are bored? you bring them with you on a short trip to Taiwan – and the cost, I’m sure you are wondering – good ole Airmiles. It’s funny to bring your western kids to a very Chinese place – especially if you have all of them with blond air because no matter how advance Taiwan is, they are extremely curious with your blond hair kids. It will be an eye opener for my kids that’s for sure and weather isn’t too bad either at this time of the year, not too hot nor too cold.
This is by far one of my favorite painting from Li Zijian – it’s about a Chinese girl who had suffered an earthquake in 2009 and still managed to rise up – resilient. The exhibition focus on the deep sorrow on the quake-hit areas and it was really a very emotional exhibition for some. I saw the beauty of the art/painting but I also saw how heartbreaking China was hit during that time. Li Zijian is an US based chinese artist and his most well known pieces were from the Nanjing Massacre – I would love to meet him.
For some people it’s a dream job – for others it can be quite taxing on any relationship. So people asked me all the time – how does our relationship survived with the spouse traveling so much. I think it’s great because he does his things and when he comes home – it’s a huge romantic get together again – and even with children – i have to say we still have it together.
Some asked me if I am worried that he may have a girlfriend at every port – and to tell you that I don’t – that’s a lie – that’s why I go visit unannounced every now and then – that way I would know if he has a girlfriend. It’s not a matter of trust – it’s a matter of being smart. If you don’t care or if you don’t demand that he is faithful then he won’t be faithful. The spouse knows what he will be up for if he was cheating on us (not just me – but the kids) and really I doubt he wants to start all over again – too lazy to start another relationship and have children all over again – hahah!
Yes, a wee bit of gold in your food – as you can see on the plate – they are really made of gold and are to be stirred around and then you can eat them and enjoy. A symbol of prosperity so I heard the friend said. When I was little my grandparents used to say how they go out with their co-workers and eat a bit of gold to have a better year. I don’t know how true it is but I’m pretty sure I didn’t feel any richer eating that little bit of gold a few weeks ago – but you know how superstition runs high in the Chinese culture – so I went a long like a good ole friend.
While the spouse loved his high tech hotels, I on the other hand loved the historical inns – I find them fascinating and magical. I loved historical inns because of their magnificient beds for they make us feel like princesses. The king or queen size four poster beds are the ones I loved most with memory foam mattress and each time we go on a vacation, I asked the spouse to try and book a historical inn. I’ve always wanted to stay at the Waverly Inn in Halifax because I’ve heard about their European styled decorated rooms with canopy beds plus I’m pretty fascinated that this building is from the 1800s. The spouse suggested that it was the canopy beds that I was interested in and instead of staying in historical inns – why not invest in one – which seems to be another good idea – but I still want to stay in as many historical inns as possible because I just loved hearing the stories behind them and look at pictures of all the famous people who might have lived in the same room as I.
No I wasn’t in Italy – but the spouse was there and we had skype one morning while he was having breakfast and getting ready to go for a meeting with an associate. People asked me all the time about this long distance relationship we have and I’ve often wondered myself how in the world did I survived. Was it because I trust the spouse so much and have no worries that he is not here all the time or is it because the children occupies all my time? or I’m so confident about myself – there is no way he would stray and that I’m so good that no other woman would interest him intellectually and emotionally?
The children does take up a lot of my time but they are all almost old enough to take care of themselves and when they were younger I couldn’t just leave them with nannies or their grandparents – it’s just not in my upbringing and I loved my kids too much. As for being so intellectual – or good in bed – I doubt so – so how do we survived? I think it’s because he is a good person – and I don’t think he would do anything to hurt the family plus I think he too is too busy with work to even make an effort to woo another woman – afterall, you and I know that wooing a woman takes time and money.
Is the art of a relationship about trusting the spouse ? I don’t think that is enough – as an expat wife, one should always keep track of what the spouse is doing and where he is. As an expat wife, you should always be independent, you have to be smart, you have to know how to take care of yourself besides the family. Never leave all your finances to your spouse because you never know if something does happen – you will be able to take care of yourself. Always stay on top of what your spouse is doing and his work as well – and don’t forget his friends and co-workers. And since my spouse travels so much for work, I try not to complain so much when we do talk – of course, that does not mean that you don’t tell him anything but you just have to time it right – when he is home.
I’ve seen men traveling for business in another country straying and having a another life altogether when they are on business – so once in a while you have to drop everything and go where the spouse is – or be in contact with the concierge there. Lucky for me, being in the hotel industry for 15 years, I’m still very much in contact with some concierge internationally. As expat wife, you have to have your antennae up all the time – yet not let the spouse see that you have your feelers up – a very tricky situation but even after being married for ages, I never let my guard down, I’m on top of things all the time.
I’ve been in Canada for so long – this must be the mildest winter ever. We didn’t have a lot of snow like other places around Nova Scotia and I’m not complaining at all. In fact, I’m hoping that it will continue to be spring weather right up to it is ready to change to Spring weather now that would be perfect. We did get freezing rain and slushy the other day but not bad, bad weather, if you know what I mean.
While my youngest wants some snow – so that she can go sledding with her friends and classmates – we hope not. We hate to disappoint her but who wants them all stuck at home with no school due to bad weather right?
